It was HAIRiffic!

My hair has been through a lot the last few year.  And some days it is still what makes me the most sad. Maybe because it such an outward visual scar everyone can see.  Especially for a woman.

When I first left my marriage at the beginning of 2010 I had long brown hair that is naturally curly.  Sometimes I made it straight. But it was very thick and long. 

 I decided to go blond for my 40th birthday in 2011.  I felt feminine and sexy for the first time in over a decade.  

This is how I looked for family pictures the week I was diagnosed in November 2011.

After I told my kids I had breast cancer my son approached me later.  Here is our conversation:

Him: Mom you gotta be tough to beat cancer don't you?

Me: REALLY tough.  Why?

Him: You don't look very tough.  

Me: Thanks.  I'm not feeling so tough either. 

Him:  You know at karate class how you teach students to spar and score points?

Me: Yeah....

Him:  And you tell them to get the first point so they feel strong?

Me: Yeah....

Him:  You need to score the first point!

Me:  What did you have in mind?

Him:  MOHAWKS!

And so we did it.  And Chemohawks were born. 

Soon after the chemohawks my hair fell out.  It looked like a troll doll had been murdered in my house.  And just in time for Christmas, I was bald.

This  picture was rough.  By now my eyelashes, eyebrows and every hair on my body was gone.  Damn it is painful when  your lashes fall out.  I mean it REALLY hurt!

About 9 months later I started getting hair again. It was baby fine. And I bleached it so I could get my Annie Lennox on!  Hey, gotta make cancer fun.  At least a little.

I rocked this blonde chemohawk for a couple of years.  I actually  became kind of known for it.  I felt fierce and sexy.

And hello?  When else can you vamp it up at the age of 40+?  I miss my blonde hawk.

So I still rock a hawk but now it's Red.  Dark red. I don't feel as fierce but it is definitely a new norm.  Hard to say what is next in my HAIRiffic journey.