What a mastectomy looks like. Before, during, and after.

It's the last words anyone wants to hear...you have breast cancer.  Been there, done that November 2011.  But the hardest part was all of the unknown.  I found a few things on the internet, but nothing with real meat. So, I'm going to throw some real gems up on this blog in hopes that someone who has been told the above words can get some direction and see real pics of what lies ahead.

Every cancer patient goes through their own journey.  And often it is in a different order then someone else they know.  I got diagnosed, a port put into my heart, and started chemo all in one week.  I did all my chemo first before my mastectomy.  I know many patients that had their mastectomy first and then did their chemo.  It's really what the surgeon and oncologist go with.  For me, my "tumor" was way too big to remove.  So we wanted to try chemo to shrink it.  And it was already spreading so we wanted to get it stopped as well.  So my chemo was first, very intense and every week for 6 months.  So lucky me, while I'm sick as hell and dying, I get to think about getting my boobs removed for 6 months.  But in the end, it was better for my body and my brain.  After 6 months of chemo, I was ready to get that damn beast out of me.  If the boobs and everything else had to go to, so be it.  Just get that bad boy OUT!

Did you know there are different kinds of mastectomy surgeries?  Geesh.  One sided, bilateral (both sides), radical (breast plus lymph nodes).  It's a buffet of boob snatching! Because I'm an overachiever I signed up for bilateral radical.  Yeah, cancer actually signed me up for that party.

I know you want to know the whole story, but it's going to get regurgitated in due time.   Today's post is all about mastectomy baby.

Let's just jump right in shall we?  Like a cold pool....

I was 40.  Two kids.  Not the body of J-Lo by any means. So my before pics aren't going to excite the senses all that much.  And my before pics were taken after already starting chemo so I didn't give a shit how "hot" I looked.  But even with the disclaimers it was hard as  hell to stand naked in front of my crazy super hot plastic surgeon. But hey, I was dying.  Not much ego left at that point.

 My cancer was in the right breast. You can tell because it didn't droop quite as much.  Maybe because a softball of a tumor surrounded by mucus filled with cancer was perking it up a bit. And that straight line that looks like a scar above the left breast is my port.

 Oh please...like you don't have stretch marks too.  I earned those birthing two kids naturally.  I consider them trophies.

Chemo makes you swell up and bloat like crazy.  I actually looked better at initial diagnosis.  But hey, this is it. Me.  Fighting for me life.

My cancer had spread to my lymph nodes so it was a really really long surgery.  8 hours or something ridiculous like that.  Takes awhile to remove two nipples, breasts and lymph nodes.  Well, at least it should if you have good surgeons like I did.  Wait, you didn't know they take your nipples?  Uh yeah.  They are the first to go.  Like cleaning out a pumpkin.  Cut around the nipple, make incisions to each side and yank it all out.  Okay, maybe not yank, but sure felt that way when I woke up!

 Bwahahaha like some deflated it!  But the cancer was finally out.  Wooohooo!

 Because I was going to need to start radiation a month after surgery my plastic surgeon put my expanders in during the same surgery as the mastectomy.  So I actually didn't wake up boobless.  But those expanders were hard as a rock and not too comfortable.  You can see he wrote 675.  That's how many cc's it was expanded.  I highly recommend you ask your surgeon to place the expanders at the time of your mastectomy.  When you see my final pics you will know why.

 I ended up getting two more expansions in his office before radiation.  I think we went to 900cc

 Radiated skin can't be expanded.  We had to do this and get my skin stretched to where we needed it for reconstruction later.

 I like these pics a lot.  I am right there on the table.  Like being on the battlefield.  And I freaking won that day.  That cancer got it's ass kicked by two of the best docs in the  business.  Warriors.

See that tape in the middle?  I'll tell you about that in a minute.

So waking up from surgery was brutal.  Holy crap it hurt.  And because they took my lymph nodes I was like a T-rex.  I couldn't move my arms except from the elbow down.  Oh I wanted to, but there was no way. Not just the pain.  I physically couldn't.  And I itched.  Like crazy.  They had tanked me up with narcotic pain killers and I was allergic.  So imagine  hives....and not being able to scratch them.  Yeah, I was praying for death.

 So see the little tube in the middle?  It's clear and goes into me?  It's a pain  ball.  It has a catheter that is inserted and kind of wound around each breast from the inside. It keeps my breast tissue (or what was left) kind of numb.  I had to carry this little bag with a ball of pain meds in it. The  ball gets smaller and smaller over time weaning you off the meds.  When it gets flat you should feel pretty good.  Ask, beg, bribe your surgeon for this.  I could NEVER have done post op without it.  I think it was in a couple of weeks? Then they just clip the sutures holding it in and pull it out.  Didn't hurt a bit when they removed it.  But I missed it.  I never slept good after that.

I can't remember for sure but I think the two pics above were while I was still in the hospital.  I was in for 9 days. ,Many women go home the next day or in a couple of days.  I just couldn't get my pain managed.  And that is saying a lot because I am tough as hell. But the narcs made me itch.  Tylenol and Ibuprofen worked awesome, but they couldn't give it often enough.  Someone snuck a back scratcher into me and I about ripped all of my skin off with it!  LOL.  But it was my proxy arm since I couldn't move.  It hurt so bad to get up.  But once I was up all I wanted to do was walk.  I would walk the halls for hours at night.  I don't know why,  but it helped my pain to walk.

Let's talk drains shall we?  I  had drains on each side.  You can see it is a tube coming out of my side.  In this pic it was full of blood and lymphatic fluid.  The drains do the job of your lymph  nodes.  When they take them out, the lymphatic fluid has no where to go, so they put drains in so it doesn't pool and cause lymphedema.

I had to pin them to this necklace when I showered.  Attractive accessory eh?  

So that grenade looking thing at the end would collect the lymphatic fluid draining out of me and through the tube.  When it would get half or more full I  had to pop the top and squirt it out in the sink. Then I  had to clear the line by running my fingers down the tube while squeezing.  This created a vacuum inside of me.  I pretty much cussed like a marine every time I had to do it.  And that was nearly hourly.  Most people only have to have drains in for a week or two.  Not me.  I'm always the exception.  Mine were in for 4 months.  They hurt.  A lot.  The tube slides in and out of  you every time you move.  It scabs.  It bleeds.  I had to wear a special camisole that I could stick the drain grenades in under my clothes.  I looked like a Mama kangaroo.  I flew several times while my drains were in.  TSA gave me hassles everytime.  Like what am I going to do?  Squirt the pilot in the eye with lymphatic fluid and take over the plane?

One of the happiest days of treatment was when they both came out.  Permanently.  First thing I did was go to the gym, work out and take a long hot shower.  BOOM!


Check back for the next installment of bye bye cancer....hello reconstruction! Lots more pics to come.